A Full Card

2 old men are playing Bingo in the church, John and Tom. John keeps looking over Tom’s shoulder saying: “you’ve got that number, mark it off, you’ve got that number mark it off.” After doing this for quite some time Tom gets annoyed and says: “why don’t you do your own card?” Whereupon John answers: “I can’t it’s full!”

Blondes and Bingo

It was a Ladies Only Night in the All Blonde Bingo Hall. The night had been pretty boring, not one single person had a BINGO all night. The last game was up for grabs, with a huge bingo prize of $3500.00 in the pot.

The game drags on and on, and nearly every blonde in the house had to be on for the big blackout. Finally, G-47 was called, but still no shouts of “Bingo!” were heard. The frustrated caller finally gets up and throws the Bingo Machine off the stage. All the girls were shocked and the caller says: “I’ve just called every darn one of these 75 balls out of this machine and nobody has a Bingo? Just what number are you ladies waiting for?” All together, 412 blonde ladies shouted: “FREE SPACE!”

The 10 commandments of Bingo

1. Thou shall not sit in thy neighbor’s lucky seat.
2. Thou shall not stare at thy neighbor’s card.
3. Thou shall not take the Callers name in vain.
4. Thou shall not call false “Bingo”.
5. Thou shall not wish bad luck on thy neighbor.
6. Thou shall not threaten to kill the “Caller”.
7. Thou shall not steal thy husband’s money for Bingo.
8. Thou shall not brag about how much thou hast won.
9. Thou shall not whine about how much thou hast lost.
10. Thou shall not covet thy neighbor’s winnings.