My Defense Your Honour
One night, an 87-year-old woman came home from Bingo to find her husband in bed with another woman. Angry, she became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 8th floor apartment, killing him instantly. When brought before the court on charges of murder, she was asked if she had anything to say to defend herself.
“Well, Your Honor,” she replied coolly. “I figured that at 92, if he could make love to another woman, he could fly!”

Betty, Ethel, Sylvia and Percy are sitting at a table at the local Bingo Hall when for the first time in 7 years Percy gets a full house. In the excitement of jumping up and down shouting Bingo, his trousers accidentally fall down, exposing him fully to the startled ladies! Betty and Ethel had a stroke, Sylvia couldn’t reach!

Mind Your Own Business
This guy had a very attractive wife who was always demanding expensive clothes and jewelry but he was not too well off. One day his wife came home with a diamond necklace.
The guy asked: “Where did you get that?”

His wife replied: “I won it at bingo”

The next night she came home with a mink coat.
The guy asked: “Where did you get that?”

His wife replied: “I won it at bingo.”

The next night she came home with a Mercedes Benz.
The guy asked: “Where did you get that?”

His wife replied: “Look!! Don’t keep asking where I get my things!! Go upstairs and run my bath for me!!”

His wife came upstairs to find a small amount of water in the tub.
The wife asked: “How come you put so little water in the tub?”

The guy replied: “I didn’t want to wet your bingo card“.

Always a Winner!
Betty and Hilda, two friends, went together to play the slot machines at their local Bingo Hall. Each agreed that when her allotted money was gone, she would go to the front of the Bingo Hall and sit on the bench to wait for her friend. Betty quickly lost all of her money and went to sit on the bench. She waited and waited and waited and waited. After what seemed an eternity, she saw Hilda coming toward her carrying a huge sack of coins. “Hey, Betty,” said Hilda, “how’d you do?” “Well, Hilda”, said Betty, “you see me here on this bench- what do you think? It looks like you hit it big, though.” “Oh yeah,” said Betty, “did I find a good machine! It’s way in the back. I’ll show it to you - you can’t lose! EVERY TIME YOU PUT IN A DOLLAR FOUR QUARTERS COME OUT!!!”

Do you take cash or credit???
Last night, my friends and I went to our local Bingo Club as they put on some male dancers for us.

One of the women wanted to impress the rest of us, so she pulled out a 10 note. When the male dancer came over to us, my friend licked the 10 bill and stuck it to his butt cheek!

Not to be outdone, another friend pulled out a 20 note. She called the dancer back, licks the 20 note and sticks it to his other butt-cheek.

In another attempt to impress the rest of us, my third friend pulls out a 50 note, calls the guy over and licks the 50 note.

I’m worried about the way things are going, but fortunately, she just stuck it to one of his butt cheeks again.

My relief was short-lived. Seeing the way things are going, the guy gyrates over to me!!!

Now everyone’s attention is focused on me, and the guy is egging me on to try to top the 50. My brain was churning as I reached for my wallet…… What could I do????

The woman in me took over! I got out my ATM card, swiped it down the crack of his ass and grabbed the eighty pounds!